Monday, November 11, 2019

Ruby's Birth Story

Ruby Jolene’s Birth Story

Let me begin by saying that Rocky’s birth was a tougher experience than I expected, even though I had an epidural. To sum up his birth story quickly, It started with my water breaking about 1:30 in the morning, followed by beginning pressure waves. We went to the hospital about 2:30 in the morning. I immediately was put on pitocin. I also received the epidural pretty early on, I think around 4 in the morning. I was able to nap for about 3 hours due to the epidural, which was nice. But Rocky’s heart rate was fluctuating and i had to be on oxygen off and on. Finally, around 12 in the afternoon, I was ready to push Rocky out. He was in distress and it took almost two hours of me pushing with all my might to get him out, and the doctor had to use the suction tool to help. Rocky came out blue and not breathing, and had swallowed meconium. A team of doctors surrounded him while I got stitched up from a second degree tear. I also felt a lot of the last little bit of pushing and felt the tearing. My blood pressure had been very high ever since arriving at the hospital. When he was finally breathing a bit, they put him on me for about 15 seconds, then whisked him away to the NICU to monitor him for a while. When they took him, i burst into tears and was left alone for an hour (CJ had gone to the NICU with him) not knowing where he was or how he was doing and it was torture. Basically, his birth was not the wonderful thing I had hoped it would be.I had a feeling that all the “drugs” I was on during the birth might have had an effect on that. I also want to note that he got all his “NEWBORN SHOTS” and his blood sugar was lower than they liked it to be, which I have since read can be a side effect of the hep b shot. 

On to Ruby’s story!

I had an unshakeable feeling that if I handled Ruby’s birth differently, everything would be okay for her. Less drugs, more natural. That’s how Heavenly Father designed us. Women are MEANT to give birth. It is probably the most amazing gift that we as women possess. But birth has been portrayed in our society as something scary and painful and dangerous. While it is an undertaking and no small feet, we were made to do it. This is something I had to train myself to accept. I also had to trust in my faith that because we women were designed to give birth, Heavenly Father would make it possible for me to do it without so much medical intervention. 

I decided to use Hypnobabies to prepare myself and give myself the mental tools I felt I needed to handle birth without the medication. Hypnobabies is an all-encompassing birth education course. It not only teaches the tools for self-hypnosis, but it covers everything you would need to know from a medical procedure standpoint, as well as after the baby is born and beyond. I had decided to go with as little medication as possible FOR MY BABY’S SAKE, not for my own. If it were just myself involved in the birth, I would 100% still get the pain medication. I have read many hypnobabies birth stories and I felt encouraged that this would be my best choice to have a non-traumatic, unmedicated birth.

The full course is 6 weeks long, with the remaining weeks before birth used for practice and maintenance. I started the course at about 27 weeks. I also want to add that I decided to employ a doula to help me realize my birth goals and help my husband with tricks and tips to help me through my birthing process. As it turned out, our cousin’s fiance Morgan had just started her own doula business, so I was excited to ask her to be my doula! She was kind enough to read some of my hypnobabies material so she would know what to expect and help with hypno-wise.

I began my birth education and hypnosis process. I listened to 2 hypnosis tracks almost every day, did some reading from a manual, listened to pregnancy affirmations, and met with Morgan a couple times before Ruby’s birth to go over techniques and plans. It wasn’t too tricky to do all of this, I would mainly do my listening at night before bed. It WAS difficult for me to stay awake during the relaxing hypnosis tracks, but that was part of the process. 

My goal was to have as natural a birth as possible, with little to no intervention. Ruby was measuring small though and doctors were worried about her nutrition levels. I went in twice a week for Non Stress Tests, and had an extra ultrasound, and everything was looking good, accepting her small size. The doctors wanted me to get induced at 39 weeks and I REALLY didn’t want that, as there was an increased chance that I would not get the unmedicated birth I wanted for Ruby. As the induction date grew closer, I talked to a midwife at the practice I go to and she decided we could push my induction date to the day after my guess date.

Saturday night before my guess date, which was the following Wednesday, I started having pressure waves. They never got very close together, I had about 2 per hour all night. I listened to the hypnosis tracks designed to help cope with this part of the birthing process. When Sunday rolled around, I was exhausted from having these regular waves, but they died out during the day and I only had a few. This happened every night until Tuesday night, and Tuesday night I had some pretty powerful waves. During the day on Tuesday, my mother-in-law encouraged me to take a walk and we walked around the block and during that time, I lost my mucus plug. I decided to leave my little boy Rocky with my in-laws that night in case my birthing time was actually beginning. My waves still weren’t close together tuesday night, but they were pretty strong, and I moaned through a lot of them. Wednesday morning, the waves were inconsistent, but happening more often. When I would stand or walk around, they happened a lot. When I sat down, they slowed down. It was hard to know if CJ and I should head to the hospital or not. I kept my doula informed and on standby. I want to mention I had been regularly visiting the chiropractor for a few weeks to make sure my hips were well aligned, and had seen him Tuesday afternoon. 

Back to Wednesday morning, my husband and I decided we might as well go to the hospital and get checked out. We arrived at the hospital about 9:30 and were admitted because I was about 3 cm dilated and was going to get induced the next morning anyway. We were put into a delivery room pretty quickly, where I was hooked up to an IV and the baby heart monitor. Because of Ruby’s size, they didn’t want me to be off the heart monitor too much. This was somewhat disappointing news because I had wanted the ability to move around as much as possible if needed. But my pressure waves had really slowed down again, I wasn’t feeling like birth was going to happen any time soon. At one point, there was a doctor, nurse, midwife, and medical student in my room at the same time and that felt a little overwhelming, and the doctor was making a big deal out of the fact that I hadn’t already been induced. After they all left, the midwife came back and talked to me much more calmly and gave me some reassurance that things were okay and Ruby was fine. Then I was started on the lowest dose of pitocin at about 11. I stayed on that dose for about an hour and a half. During this time, pressure waves increased and picked up in intensity. I was still very comfortable through most of this though, I did NOT think Ruby would arrive soon. I had been in the hospital bed the whole time and hadn’t felt the need for anything to help me cope yet. Then, they upped the dose of pitocin by one level and very quickly, the intensity got real. I started moaning quite a bit through my waves, and I got out of bed and onto a birth ball. I used the bathroom a couple times and had to pause on the way to the bathroom, in the bathroom, and on the way back to the hospital bed while coping with waves. I had my hypnosis tracks playing in earbuds this whole time and the reminders I was hearing were helping me get through things. My doula and husband helped with the intensity by rubbing my back in firm, downward motions. As the waves got more intense, my husband applied counter pressure on my hips, which helped immensely. 

Around 2:30, my water had not broken yet. I remember the nurse asking me if I felt like I was getting close. Although the intensity had increased, I still didn’t feel like we were close and I remember telling her, “things would have to get a lot more intense, right?”  But as I got up from the birth ball, a powerful wave came on and all the sudden, I felt something large down there! I couldn’t believe it, was that her head? The nurse had just asked if I was feeling any pushiness, and I told her not yet, and already, my body was wanting to push! My water had also broken as I stood up, so I got onto the bed on hands and knees and started pushing because my body just wanted to. It was INTENSE, but I honestly wouldn’t describe it as painful. Definitely a powerful feeling of pressure and just PUSHING. The midwife had come in at that point and she checked to make sure I was fully dilated, and sure enough, I was. I pushed on hands and knees for a bit, and yelled quite a bit during this part. I’m not too sure of everything that was happening at this point, but one thing I do remember was the nurse kept trying to find Ruby’s heartbeat with the monitor and that was pretty annoying. After pushing on hands a knees for a little bit, she wasn’t quite coming out, so the midwife suggested I try on my back. I still felt like I had a lot of energy at this point, I hadn’t reached exhaustion yet. I flipped around to my back, but I was more upright than I had been with Rocky. The only difficulty about this position was that I didn’t feel like I could bear down as much as I could on hands and knees. The amazing thing this whole time is that in between pressure waves, I felt so relaxed, I could actually rest. But I didn’t want to have as much tearing I had with Rocky’s birth, so I tried a little pushing in between waves. Once on my back, I said I felt like I was falling and not able to push against anything, so they suggest grabbing my legs above the knee. I did this with just my right leg, and my left stayed down on the bed. For some reason, this felt most comfortable. I remember my husband, doula, and the midwife all encouraging me as I pushed. The atmosphere in the room was very positive, and I was grateful for that. 

After about 20 minutes of pushing, I remember saying a prayer asking for strength, and then I started to feel a burning sensation as Ruby was crowning. This was the first time I’d say it hurt. But it was not a level of pain I couldn’t handle, and I knew she was close, so I was motivated to push her out fast. I remember one more big push where I gave it my all, and then she slipped out and they immediately put her on my chest as my doula literally ripped my hospital gown off to allow Ruby and I to be skin to skin. It was euphoric. We did it! I was so happy and so ecstatic and delighted and everything wonderful. My little girl was here and with very little intervention, and she pinked up and was so healthy! She was indeed very tiny at only 5’ 3”, but she was so healthy and she started nursing almost instantly. Total push time was about half an hour and she was born at 3:33 in the afternoon. We had only been at the hospital for 6 hours! Another fact I couldn’t believe, because that morning, I felt for sure we would be waiting a long time. It was just wonderful. Her cord stopped pulsating very quickly, so it was clamped soon after she was born, I knew I still needed to push the placenta out, but my baby girl was on my chest and was adorable, I wasn’t worried about anything else. Luckily, my midwife had been gently massaging my perineum, so I only had a minor tear that did not need stitching. After a few smaller waves, I pushed and my midwife gently removed the placenta. That part was absolutely easy! Then my hubby and I were left to love our baby for several minutes and I was just on this incredible birth high that I can’t fully explain!  I am beyond happy with Ruby’s birth experience and would use hypnobabies and go without an epidural again in a heartbeat. I am grateful for the lessons I learned from both births and would definitely want to help others in their birth journey! I hope someday to become a hypnobabies instructor and/or doula.


Friday, August 19, 2016

Top Ten Things I've Learned From Being Married To C.J.

It's our anniversary today, so I decided to share a top ten list, thanks, David Letterman.

10. Bike parts in every room of the house is just normal

9. Graffiti IS cool 

8. There is no slow, medium, or moderately fast on a jet ski. There's just fast

7. AUTHENTIC Mexican food IS the best Mexican food

6. Cars are not just for driving from point A. to point B. They are toys for puddles, dirt, hills, rocks, water,...

5. Two hours IS enough time to squeeze in a lake trip or bike park trip or snowboarding trip 

4. It's okay to miss the previews at the movie theater as long as you get popcorn with LOTS of butter

3. Food can never be TOO spicy 

2. Nothing is stopping anyone from having fun, all you need is something with wheels. Or a board. Or a trampoline. Or water. Or a jump of some sort. 

And finally number 1!
Life shouldn't be lived by watching other people live it, get out there and DO!! 

I love my husband CJ so much. I've had more adventure with him in the past two years than I ever thought I would as an old, married lady. And that's not the only awesome thing about being married to CJ. He's an amazing father to our baby boy, Rocky. He's a strong, spiritual man who knows what is truly important in life. He knows and believes in his Savior, Jesus Christ. He is an example to many people around him, including family members and friends. My family is truly grateful he is the man I married. Love you, CJ Riley!! I can't wait for our many more adventures to come!! <3

Wednesday, May 18, 2016

I Quit Sugar

 Day 3. I have successfully avoided all sugar and carbs on my sugar detox. Today I had definite withdrawal symptoms. I woke up shaking, and quickly ate a smoothie with JUST fruit in it. No extra yogurt, no sugary fruit juice, JUST fruit. It was actually delicious, like almost dessert-y. Then I got around to boiling eggs and shoving some nuts and veggies in my mouth. I have to eat fast, like no more than 10 min can be dedicated to food. But eating raw fruits, nuts, and veggies is easy and takes no time at all!! 


Let me back up. 

I love sugar. I mean LOVE. I usually eat a dessert of some sort once a day, and usually have a few pieces of candy, and or drink juice and eat ice cream, lots of times just straight out of the container. 

I gave up chocolate after Rocky was born because it seemed to upset his tummy and I didn't want the little guy to be miserable. But I thought about it all. The. Time. And figured out other foods that were equally as sugary that I could enjoy almost as much. Then it kind of started to occur to me that I may have a little bit of an addiction to the sweet stuff. That I may actually be a bit out of control . I started to think about my family's health history, and it's not awesome. I thought a lot about Rocky and how I want him to be healthy and to think that eating healthy is the norm, not the exception. And I want to be healthy for him and C.J. so I can live a full life with them and any other little ones that come to us. I realized I needed to make a permanent change, not just a week-long one. 

I started reading about detoxes. There are all kinds out there, 10-day plans, three-week plans, 8-week plans....I didn't actually pick a particular plan. I just looked at what you are supposed to eat when you detox. Pretty much meat, fruits, veggies, eggs, and nuts. A lot of veggies, a good amount of protein, and fruit when you really need sugar. I'm not telling anyone out there to do what I did because everyone is different, I don't want to advise anyone health-wise because frankly, I barely know what I'm doing. 

That pretty much brings us to where I'm at today. Day three and no sugar or carbs. Carbs metabolize into sugar, so if you're going to kick the addiction in the rear, you have to eliminate them almost completely. Some other symptoms I've had today are muscle soreness and I've felt pretty low energy, everything I've read says that is totally normal and can last a couple days to a couple weeks, so we shall see. I'll give you the good news if all goes well and I come out of this feeling better than ever. A lot of people that have quit sugar say that their mind is clearer, they don't have the afternoon slump every day, they have more energy,... I'm really looking forward to that, especially having my baby boy. I thought about trying really expensive supplements, but really, I just needed a life-style change. I'll keep you posted on how I feel . Peace out for now. 


Day 4. I am writing already because I feel much better today than I did yesterday. I did yoga this morning and went for a run and I have much less muscle soreness. I also was not shaky at all today. I did feel pretty exhausted a couple times, but that's probably because I didn't fall asleep until 12:30 and Rocky woke up two more times after that. I also didn't even "crave" sugar. I thought about it a couple times, but not in the "I NEED SOME RIGHT NOW" way. I've actually craved potato chips more than anything, another addiction I want to kick in the bee-hind. Anywho, I feel like this is going to be a good change in my life. I also feel that I am being given help as I try this. Heavenly Father wants us to have good lives. The more self control we can practice, the happier we are, and the healthier we are. I'm slowly going to incorporate healthy carbs back into my diet in a couple weeks, but for now, I'm playing it safe without most of them.

Day 5. I'm thinking I'll actually put some carbs into my diet next week. Probably some quinoa and maybe sweet potatoes.  I feel really good today, I'm not really having any strange symptoms, I ate a very satisfying breakfast of meat,  veggies and eggs, made by CJ, and I'm going strong. I don't even want sugar right now.  

Last night I had a bit of a cheat night and ate Thai food. I had some hot and sour soup, which probably has a lot of sodium, but also had lots of chicken and veggies. I also had fried rice with beef, eggs and veggies. My first carbs all week. I still didn't eat sugar, and every time I've wanted sugar, I had fruit instead. The meal tasted amazing, but kinda messed with my stomach a bit. Worth it though. And when I know I'm not ALWAYS eating super bad foods, it feels okay to eat what I want some of the time. That's kind of what I'm hoping to gain from all of this.

The start of my second week!

I had carbs Saturday and Sunday night in the form of potatoes, but I don't think that set me back, I've been fine and had a delicious smoothie with only fresh fruit, it was seriously super yummy and now I'm kind of craving those more than a chocolate-y or caramel-y treat. But I'm pretty darn sure I'll never be able to kick sugar completely, and I don't want to! I just want to bring balance to my eating and not need dessert with breakfast, lunch, afternoon snack, and dinner. Maybe a once a week treat is what I'll try. And then I'll really make that treat count! I also want to have healthy carbs in my life for energy. And occasionally bring back my old buddies, Lays potato chips. 
This is an example of a lunch time meal. Veggies fried in a little EVOO, some turkey meat and a fried egg. Sometimes I had smoothies with my meals as well, which are really starting to feel like decadent desserts to me! By the way, I'm learning about shopping for the right stuff too and where to go. I think Costco is the best for nuts, berries, eggs, bell peppers, grapes, and lunch meats. I got a load of veggies there and though we are trying to eat them all, I don't think it will happen. CJ has made me breakfast a few times and he does delicious scrambles. I've had bacon a few times too this week, so I'm not without some unhealthy stuff. But bacon is bacon and if I stop eating it, I might as well die. 

Anywho, lots of words and sorry if it was kind of boring. If you need encouragement to go sugarless, I'll help you out!! I'm hoping to make it a full second week, and maybe this Sunday, allow myself something sugary. But maybe I'll go three weeks, who knows. 

Tuesday, March 22, 2016

First-time Mom Thoughts

My baby is going to be three months in three days, so I thought I'd share some of the thoughts I've had during this new experience.

Mom thoughts 

Every piece of cloth can double as a burp rag if you only put your mind to it.

As long as I'm nursing, I'll never forget his food.

There's mountain time, pacific time, a few others; and baby time.

I never knew I could shower so fast.

To do list....learn to tie shoe with one hand... And do hair, put on makeup, clean, make bed, cook dinner,....

The world is infested with germs and disease, it's the freaking walking dead out there!

You have never known fear until your baby hasn't pooped for 2 days. You know that's going to be a blow out of epic proportions.

I have a testimony that I know swaddling is true.

What's with his Edward Scissorhands fingernails?? Those babies could kill someone!

He is sleeping in longer intervals. But I can't sleep because I'm worried about why he's still asleep.

Like all moms do, sometimes I think my baby is a genius. Until he has grabbed a fistful of my hair in both hands and is flailing his arms all over. Then I think he's an evil genius. 

Baby PJs should never have snaps, only zippers. Who can figure those things out when it's 2 am, you're up for the third time in one night, trying to change a diaper with your eyes half open and your brain still partly in dreamland?

Who knew I'd start having dreams  about poopy diapers.

I don't understand how he can be sleeping peacefully on my lap, either leaning against my chest, or against my legs, facing me, and then sharply dive sideways, head first. Does he have a death wish or something? 

I'm worried, he's serious all day with mommy, then as soon as daddy gets home, it's all smiles. He's messing with my head.

If I smell like pee or throw up, don't worry. It is pee or throw up.

Hurry lets go I just fed the baby he's happy if we are gonna go we have to go NOW, GO GO GO GO!!!

Nobody questions the diaper bag full of stuff. Before the baby, it would have looked slightly strange, carrying around such a big, full bag. But now, I can carry my bag, full of stuff and nobody questions it. 

All I can say about my post pregnant body is thank goodness for stretchy pants of any kind. Yoga. Leggings, elastic waistbands, all my best friends.

Somewhere out there is a new mom who's house is perfectly clean, who is cooking healthy meals for her hubby, who already fits back into her skinny jeans, and who Has d-I-y'd her entire living room decor. But, to quote a popular classic rock artist, it ain't me.

I just need you to think your fist is a food source for like ten more minutes while I finish *insert task*

Am I awake right now? 

I can't remember when I last changed his diaper.

His smile is THE MOST AMAZING THING I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE!!!


Thursday, January 14, 2016

Actually a Christmas Baby

Well, I was being a bit sarcastic in the title of my last blog post, but I guess I better eat my words because little Rocky actually is a Christmas baby :)

Wednesday was my due date. Christmas was 2 days later. When Wednesday came and went, I was resigned to being pregnant for the rest of my life. He was going to grow and thrive and attend college, all while in my womb. And Thursday was Christmas Eve, filled with family festivities, but still no sign of little Rocky. I guess that's good because I had time to clean and nap, but mostly clean, and not nap. During these couple days, I had one thing to keep me sane. Little Cavin, our nephew who has literally been there for every major event in CJ's and my relationship, said on Wednesday, "Rocky will be born in 2 days!" I said, "2 days? That's Christmas!" He said, "yep, that's when he will be born!" So I relied on Cavin's prediction to help me not go too crazy, because hey, the little guy proposed to me for CJ, he is pretty reliable! Christmas Eve, he said, "Rocky is coming tomorrow!!" It was getting spooky how adamant he was about Rocky's arrival date.

At home Christmas Eve night, after all the festivities, CJ and I decided to open gifts to each other because we weren't sure if the next day we would have time. Not because we felt like Rocky might show up, but because we had lots of Christmas plans that day, and as mentioned above, Rocky was going to be in the womb forever.

We went to bed around midnight. At about 1:30, I woke up to a strange feeling that lasted a few seconds. It didn't hurt necessarily, but I remember having the thought, "well that was new." And I got up to use the bathroom. While on my way there, my water broke. Again, in my mind, the thought, "huh, that was new." And the question, "was that my water breaking, or did I just lose all control of myself?" 

After waiting just a few minutes, I was sure I was experiencing something close to what you see on TV as labor. CJ was up and ready in a flash, we were out the door in maybe ten minutes. We never even rehearsed it, beat that, Internet mom bloggers! After an icy but safe drive to the hospital, we were AT the hospital.

The rest is history and Rocky WILL be attending college outside of the womb.  

Jk jk, I'll add a few more details :) 

We got checked in and after the nurse determined my water had really broken, I was admitted and we got to stay. None of that, "you may have a while so why don't you go home" poop that I hear happens so much. My contractions were about 5 min apart. After feeling several of those lovely things, I was ready for an epidural. Once that was in, I was on cloud 9. No pain, no gain is false, people. What would I really gain from continuing to feel contraction pain other than the desire that Rocky be an only child, I ask you? 

I continued "laboring" until around 11 the next morning, when it felt like the magical epidural wasn't being so magical anymore. Apparently the monitor thingy was picking up on things because the nurse came and checked me right as I called her and I was dilated to a ten. If you are like my brother, Gabe, you have no idea what that means. I'll save you the trouble (and horror) of looking that up. It just means you're ready to push that baby outta there. 

Push, I did, for almost two hours. During that time, my thoughts were, "I'm so out of shape. I regret all those non-workout naps" 

On a more serious note, Rocky wasn't coming out. And I was pushing so hard I felt like my head was going to explode. All that time I could hear his little heartbeat on the monitor. It was fluctuating so much, sometimes it was dangerously slow, other times dangerously fast. And I prayed. I prayed, "please Father, help me get my baby out and keep him safe. Give him strength. Give me strength." 

By the end of those couple hours, the doc determined I needed help getting him out, and so he plundered him out. Ever seen a toilet plunger? Yeah, it did kind of look like those. And finally little Rocky was out. But he was lifeless, very limp. And a team of doctors had come in to revive him. CJ kept watch as the doctors worked fast to clear his tiny lungs and I was being stitched up. I could fully feel things at this point, but I didn't care, my baby was a few feet away from me fighting for life. Again, more prayers, keep him safe, give him strength. 

After what felt like way too long, Rocky was responding and a nurse brought him to me for just a few brief moments before they had to take him to the nicu. He was so tiny, his little limbs were thin and delicate, but also VERY strong. I looked at him and tried to let it wash over me that this was our little boy we had waited for. And then they took him away. He was gone for an hour before I knew if he was okay. Finally a nurse came and I asked her how he was doing. He was okay! He was doing well and they were going to bring him to me soon! Best news I've ever received in my entire life. After that, my little rockstar continued to get stronger and stronger.

Finally he was brought back to me and we got to bond. Which was basically his little mouth baby-birding it and me trying to feed him for the first time. But oh my goodness, how I loved this tiny little being. He wasn't very big, and his little shoulder blades were clearly visible as he had zero fat to cover them. He was so beautiful, his face had these tiny little features, I couldn't believe he was ours. I still can't sometimes to this day. He's been flourishing and is already about 12 lbs, almost twice his birth weight. He is learning so much already and responding to things in the cutest ways. I love when he gets so excited his little legs just kick kick kick KICK!! He already has a lil double chin and some chunky cheeks too, and he smiles and coos, it's the cutest thing I've ever seen/heard. Needless to say C.J. and I are deeply in love.
 
Babies are amazing and when a four, almost five-year-old speaks, listen up!!
Our little 6 lb 7 oz, 21 inch baby boy :)